My comments about ‘seeing’ parents and grandparents in our charts (in the ‘Family Pickle’ post) evidently popped a few blogged eyes (I be blogger, you be mine blogged). So I thought to offer a few points for contemplation.
And maybe for doing other things with - suit yourself.
Let’s start by think of the zodiac as a giant radio dial with 360 stations we call degrees. We tune into each of these degrees at their given frequency.
You with me?
The astrologic/human term for that ‘vibe’ thing is a chart position. So we get born with a horoscope, a chart that tells us which vibes we’re attuned to, that we'll more or less 'naturally' tune in to - and how we’ll tend to operate (until we learn better, in some cases!).
And who we attract. Who we'll choose to hang with. Or yes, run from....sometimes with good reason, as I found out so recently. Sometimes we just know someone is no good for us. We’ll be all friendly and noble, we’ll do a whole noble ‘they get to be who they are, I get to be me’ thing…Then it happens. We find out that we were right to begin with, screw all those noble-sounding allowances.
As I noted in my ‘Family Pickle’ blog, sometimes we could have saved ourselves a lot of time and grief by looking at charts to begin with.
On the other hand, life needs to be lived. So okay, we live. We learn. Sometimes we triumph and sometimes we end up doing time working on our weeping quotient.
Obviously when we’re born, the first people we meet up with are parents and family. And there is a lot of lore (aka statistical evidence) out there to suggest that certain symbols are often in aspect from parent to child. The most talked about is Jupiter – which makes sense as Jupiter symbolizes teaching and learning. Often the parent/child chart comparison has a parent’s Jupiter in aspect to that of the child.
But sometimes it’s some other planet. Whatever it is (or they are, since often one or more planets are in aspect between a parent and child)....those are the things we learn from them. Those aspects also describe how they appear to be to us because that’s what we’ve learned OF them. Or ABOUT them. Which is one of the reasons (and techniques) I use as an astrologer to read in your chart who your parents and grandparents were.
Generally what I will read out will sound a little foreign to you. But that's because you think of your parents as YOUR parents - not as independent people in their own right. It's tough getting the 'mom and pop' out of your head...but once people do, they not only recognize who I'm talking about, but sometimes things that they missed about the folks.
Anyway, back to us...Whether we ‘mesh’ with our early ‘family’ (biological or otherwise) we get ‘habituated’ by them. And sure as shootin’ we’ll react to those degrees, down the line.
Even more curious, we can get ‘broken in’ by people in our youth to degrees which aren’t even occupied in our chart – by a planet, cusp or node, I mean. (You know, the “usual” astro-stuff.) Truth is, there is so much out there in the cosmos that every degree of the zodiac is pretty much occupied at all times. Why some things count more than others seems to be sort of about broad brush strokes versus nuances – the things we can see which are ‘obvious’ up there in the sky are mirrored in the ‘obvious’ qualities, questions and challenges we encounter as people.
And yes – we do all wish we could change things. Not just from time to time, but fairly frequently, I’m sure.
Bottom line, we humans appear to be pretty much creatures of habit. When someone has been around us a long time, we adapt to the vibe even if we don’t love it. It’s that dent in the mattress after it’s been slept on a few years. I had a sister who died a long time ago; her Sun was at 15 Taurus, a degree I have nothing of note positioned in. But decades later I had to get myself a new doctor. And the moment I met my new GP, there was this feeling of…familiarity.
Sure enough, I later learned his Sun was at 15 Taurus. So I understood why he feels ‘familiar.’ Even more than that, as I’ve gotten to know him, our doctor/patient friendship has come to be comforting to me. Some small part of what I lost in my early teens when my sister passed away…a little bit of that chasm has gotten ‘filled in’ by his becoming one of the vibes in my life.
In one of my ‘Family Pickle’ comments I noted how almost everyone in my personal ‘close circle’ have some point (all different) in the chart which is going to get thwacked by this summer’s eclipse at 19 Cancer – a degree which in my personal chart is occupied by Uranus. We do collect people who in one way or another 'fit' with our chart. The people I’m referring to - our ages differ. Our walks of life differ. Our functions in each other’s lives – those differ too. Given that this is my Uranus we're talking about, some are drawn to me because I'm an astrologer. Some like my quirky sense of humor. Some are part of an unconventional (Uranian) 'family' I've constructed for myself since my family of origin is...well, let's go with 'disrupted' - another Uranus word. And my Uranus is in my 4th house - the house of family, heritage and origin.
I know each of us is about to undergo some form of personal revolutionary evolution. The two, two-and-a-half-month standard ‘lead-in’ to the solar eclipse where things begin breaking down, that’s already begun. I know eclipses can be trés difficult - to put it mildly. So I hope to be where I need to be for them, and hope will do their best (a relative term, I know) to be there for me.
In the end, maybe that’s why we’re part of each other’s lives. Through me, they evolve. Maybe I rattle chains or spark new ideas wherever 19 Cancer lies in their chart. Meanwhile through them, I evolve: I learn more about myself, I am given the support I obviously and oh-so human(e)ly need.
That's just the way it works. And maybe understanding that better, or getting better settled with that understanding - maybe even passing the information on to you...maybe that’s part of my eclipse lesson.
Maybe? A girl can certainly hope!
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Showing posts with label family/non-family aspects. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family/non-family aspects. Show all posts
Monday, June 7, 2010
Sunday, June 6, 2010
Family Pickles: the Astrology of Habituation
Did you wonder? After posting a story about incredible sadness and a relationship debacle which shattered arguably the most important relationship I’ve ever had (“Deep Night, No Dawn in Sight”), today I posted an astro-bio commentary on Jeffrey Dahmer.
More than a few people were probably grossed out. Part of this is just about what astrologers do – I have an astrologer friend I email back and forth with. He and I have spent the past couple of weeks discussing points erotic and galactic one-way doors in time and the human mind. And yes, I tried out some of our theories out using my data files, including one I call “criminals of infamy.”
I’d gone in there meaning to pull up the chart of the Marquis de Sade, but my finger clicked on Dahmer. And what I saw was so illuminating and so sad…
...If you were offended, I apologize. But I also don’t think we can have beauty if we aren’t prepared to see the shadows which give light shape.
After all that, came down, my brother called. He had news: our mutual mother (we have different fathers) appears to have cancer. Metastasized cancer.
I scarcely knew what to say. My mother has been the shadow terror of my life. When I say in some past post that I’d written a memoir which amounts to Mommie Dearest meets The Jaycee Dugard Story, that all started with her. The myth of Medusa seems to have some bright spots. Me and my mother? Not a one.
But I’ve never wished her ill. All I ever wanted was for her to let me go. To stop threatening with her need to possess me.
Anyway, when I hung up after talking to my brother, I looked up mother’s horoscope, a chart I've had for years but literally never looked at.
So today, I looked. And what do my eyes see there? That the Moon in mother's chart is at exactly the same degree as the Moon in the chart of the woman who set up the shattering of my relationship with that dearly loved Protector friend of mine.
The astrological/mental dotted line here seems drawn by a thought I had after the December 2009/January 2010 eclipses spelled the crunching of my world as then known. It took a couple of months for my brain to chill out, but finally I found myself thinking I bet if I had met my mother as an adult – (meaning when I was an adult) – I would have thought mother was rather like that woman.
Now I can say - oh, how right I was! The astrological lesson is about how we get habituated to certain degrees...particularly those which relate to family charts (for good or ill). The people we meet early and become so deeply impressed by are literally 'written' in our charts. I can take a chart and describe not only your interaction with your parents, but their interaction with their parents.
And when one person 'leaves' those degrees, often - unconsciously - we 'pull in' someone else to fill that psychic void. Thus do our patterns repeat until we learn better - until we understand the Self in our chart.
As for the real life part of this, I'm working on it. I wish no one ill, or illness – not even the mother who dismembered my life before it barely started.
By now I’ve lived so long with this cloud over my world that the whole idea it might go away...that seems totally, entirely odd. Strange...and stranger.
Maybe some director will yell ‘cut!’ and I’ll find out it’s all pretend. (Not!)
Maybe this is all about the last reel of an extremely long film unwinding to its end. (More likely.)
In any case, that's one solar and one lunar eclipse down, four more solars in a row yet to go before my life again settles into place. This is going to take more than coffee and a chocolate bar, I can tell.
Sometimes the world is so bewildering!. As an astrologer you 'get it,' though that doesn't stop it from getting you.
.
More than a few people were probably grossed out. Part of this is just about what astrologers do – I have an astrologer friend I email back and forth with. He and I have spent the past couple of weeks discussing points erotic and galactic one-way doors in time and the human mind. And yes, I tried out some of our theories out using my data files, including one I call “criminals of infamy.”
I’d gone in there meaning to pull up the chart of the Marquis de Sade, but my finger clicked on Dahmer. And what I saw was so illuminating and so sad…
...If you were offended, I apologize. But I also don’t think we can have beauty if we aren’t prepared to see the shadows which give light shape.
After all that, came down, my brother called. He had news: our mutual mother (we have different fathers) appears to have cancer. Metastasized cancer.
I scarcely knew what to say. My mother has been the shadow terror of my life. When I say in some past post that I’d written a memoir which amounts to Mommie Dearest meets The Jaycee Dugard Story, that all started with her. The myth of Medusa seems to have some bright spots. Me and my mother? Not a one.
But I’ve never wished her ill. All I ever wanted was for her to let me go. To stop threatening with her need to possess me.
Anyway, when I hung up after talking to my brother, I looked up mother’s horoscope, a chart I've had for years but literally never looked at.
So today, I looked. And what do my eyes see there? That the Moon in mother's chart is at exactly the same degree as the Moon in the chart of the woman who set up the shattering of my relationship with that dearly loved Protector friend of mine.
The astrological/mental dotted line here seems drawn by a thought I had after the December 2009/January 2010 eclipses spelled the crunching of my world as then known. It took a couple of months for my brain to chill out, but finally I found myself thinking I bet if I had met my mother as an adult – (meaning when I was an adult) – I would have thought mother was rather like that woman.
Now I can say - oh, how right I was! The astrological lesson is about how we get habituated to certain degrees...particularly those which relate to family charts (for good or ill). The people we meet early and become so deeply impressed by are literally 'written' in our charts. I can take a chart and describe not only your interaction with your parents, but their interaction with their parents.
And when one person 'leaves' those degrees, often - unconsciously - we 'pull in' someone else to fill that psychic void. Thus do our patterns repeat until we learn better - until we understand the Self in our chart.
As for the real life part of this, I'm working on it. I wish no one ill, or illness – not even the mother who dismembered my life before it barely started.
By now I’ve lived so long with this cloud over my world that the whole idea it might go away...that seems totally, entirely odd. Strange...and stranger.
Maybe some director will yell ‘cut!’ and I’ll find out it’s all pretend. (Not!)
Maybe this is all about the last reel of an extremely long film unwinding to its end. (More likely.)
In any case, that's one solar and one lunar eclipse down, four more solars in a row yet to go before my life again settles into place. This is going to take more than coffee and a chocolate bar, I can tell.
Sometimes the world is so bewildering!. As an astrologer you 'get it,' though that doesn't stop it from getting you.
.
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