Neptune Directions: Right vs Real

Ephiphanie

A triptychon by Hieronymus Bosch (1475-1499)

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Just about the time we feel like we’re going to move on and get past whatever we’ve been dealing with, suddenly life takes a turn.

No, you’re not so sure, life says. So are you sure you want to…(choice of one or more: let go of, start to do, look at, talk about, ignore, go about being)…that?

There are two sets of metaphysical concepts involved here…the first being all about our relationship to reality. Do we see only that part of life we want to see? If so, why would we do that?

Whatever your coping mechanism (and we all have one or two)(or three or four)…the ‘why’ behind why you even need to cope is the sort of discomfort with how you feel about life which is plainly and uniquely Piscean.

It’s also 12th house. And yes, sort of Neptunian.

In this triad, Neptune is the verb – the ‘to 12th house’ where the 12th house (of any chart) is where the sign on the cusp describes the situations we set up in life in order to test our own vulnerabilities.

Why would we do that?

Answer: so as to grow. There is a wellspring of spirit of life seeking to exist which animates our existence in this time and moment. And that quotient both knows that we can survive most of what we fear and that we need fears. Fears are what allow us to feel ourselves feeling our feelings and reacting in real time…and in highly memorable ways.

We learn a lot through reflecting on own own emotions. Good or bad, we learn.

Considering how Neptune is going direct so soon after the Scorpio solar eclipse, whatever else is happening in your life it is likely that ‘structures’ are now beginning to crumble or become (at some level) less viable. Or maybe less ‘strict’ by definition.

In fact, Neptune going direct about a week after Jupiter goes retrograde is somewhat akin to whatever process in life is melting (Neptune) away some of the barriers which have stood in your way.

And yet…at the same time, that very same Neptune-Jupiter relationship also recalls some of the ‘unveiling’ qualities which suggest we may (Jupiter retrograde) learn something worth thinking about… often through others.

Probably most tempting-taunting-beckoning of all, however is the fact that Neptune is going direct on November 13th with Mercury having gone direct on the 10th.

This sort of begs a personal question: are you on the verge of creating something magical? Or maybe you’re someone poised to experience several very personal-feeling days where you find out you’ve lied…most of all to yourself…about something.

Oh, the good and bad of life. How often they coincide.

(Augh.)

(Yes, I just had to slip that in.)

Mercury-Neptune connections are famous for illusions, delusions, lies and deceptions. But all is not lost here: Mercury-Neptune…especially as presented here in Scorpio (Mercury) and Pisces (Neptune) is equally a representation of deep, emotionally resonant,

And this is no entirely uncommon common water sign trine we’re talking about, neither. No…this one i s where both participants are at 2 degrees of respective signs.

So…whatever else happened between…well, between November 8th and 15th (taking both stations into account)…it would be likely for these days to just feel personal. Everything may feel like it’s a critique. Or maybe you’re feeling the tug (good or bad) of everybody needing you. Or maybe you’re behind on things you had wanted to get done by now.

Some of us will experience these days as frustration, others as a revelation. Some of us will go through these days just happy to be reasonably invisible. Neptune-Mercury effects can herald the terribly good day, the inordinately magical day, the utterly helpless-feeling time.

It all depends on where 2 Pisces (Neptune’s position) and 2 Scorpio (Mercury’s degree of station) fall in your personal chart. And where both planets are in said natal chart.

Beyond that, there is the matter that Neptune is also in opposition to Pallas going into this station – with Pallas having entered Virgo just as the eclipse moved through.

It would seem to be a time which is whispering to us about all and everything we need to be smarter about with regards to the ‘who it is’ we’re being.

And how important it is to be that person not superficially, but genuinely – at your core, no matter how difficult that feels like it is.

One way or another, we’re going to get there. With and within the uncertainty and illusory delights of a Neptune station so closely associated with the kind of human ties emotional…evocative…thought provoking…which we experience with-and-through our ties to others now, at this turn of a Mercurial tide…

It could be one or many things. You may become overly aware that your life is driven by one or many things…and how some of them are assumptions.

Or realities never dealt with properly as realities. Wherever we have kidded ourselves, particularly where that concerns relationships and what parts of our own psyche we are willing to experience through our relationships with others…maybe not the actual situation, but the feelings which remind you of ‘something else’ now echo again through life.

It’s a freshly bitter rain. There are times when we need to be strung along the ragged edges of our soul so that we can experience growing up through coping with trials and disappointments, whether big or small.

As represented by Ceres at 3 Libra, plans (Ceres) now reach a moment of (Neptunian) uncertainty. There are lots of questions you could ask yourself about your uncertainty, yes. I suggest putting ‘what can I learn which will help me going forward through not just the responses I get, but who I get them from?’ on the list.

The other way to see this is in the Neptune-to-Ceres (8th derivation) sort of way. There, all Neptune’s ‘dissolving’ qualities would seem to be highlighted in a (Pisces)water-on-air(Libra) sort of way.

Water, meaning emotion...plus air, meaning communication?

One wonders what will come of that. I could hope for plans on how to deal with feelings or feelings about things, but how many people are actually that constructive that often?

I can hope, yes.

And yet, having learned so painfully and completely that even someone with strikingly good intentions can fall off the face of their personal Earth when they least expect it…I wonder.

Mercury in Scorpio expresses a certain kind of strength, a certain kind of emotional strength with others and with ourselves. Theoretically, we are now capable of great achievements moving forward providing and to the degree that we are willing to get our Neptunian ego – including ego-driven fears for/about Self – under control.

Or better yet, released. You know, so we can fly away on our own wings, wings unencumbered by our own sense of the improbable reduced to impossible by our unwillingness to try. 

Though a graveyard is just another piece of land, the feelings about them and the

indescribable senses we get when walking through one are very real... and very Neptunian.

(photo credit: an Easton Maudit church yard by R. Neil Marshman, November 2005)

The thing hardly anyone talks about when they talk about Neptune is its relationship to Saturn. I wasn’t surprised when NASA (bless their chip-driven heart) released news that Neptune has rings. And I don’t have to do a bunch of fancy math, though you know me, I’m devilish.

Maybe my favorite portrayal of the Devil ever to grace the silver screen, the above photo is Elizabeth Hurley as the satanic one in the Warner Bros/Regency film

'Bedazzled.' I'm pretty sure every woman has wanted to be her kind of

Devil at some point!

I like a fair slosh of math here and again, just to wallow in the glory of universal communication. (But I do know – generally – that that’s just me. I’m muy geeky. About my only question there is whether I’m a nerdy geek or a geeky nerd.)

Back to the metaphysical point, a point maybe best illustrated by a question I fielded years ago (and yes, I still remember it) about the ‘allowing yourself not to know’ quality which is so very and innately Neptunian.

Question: can’t we ever know anything Neptunian?

Answer: No. Once we can identify it, it’s no longer a Neptunian precept – it’s Saturnine. Neptune is ‘non-reality’ and Saturn represents reality and all you ‘know’ as real…right down to the realities of life created through how well or how badly aligned we are with others in relationship/s (….which would be why Saturn is exalted in Libra and the “LIbran” 7th).

This is the concept which defines this time as a time when nothing is really….defined. It’s all in flux. 
Everything is up for being…redefined.

And that’s just the thing – this is a time about the flexing and the fluctuating, the eternally knowing that you’re about to know how to make ‘it’ work…with only the barest sparkle of humor most painful at the thought that in you dedication you may also be seeding, building and carefully tending to that which will blossom into your very worst friend.

You just don’t know. None of us knows – that’s the Neptune issue. So long as we are focusing on our Self (or that which will benefit that Self) Neptune becomes the soggy mass of self-tying rope which has just planted itself around our feet.

So maybe you really want everything to not only just be right and run right and go right and feel right (and all that)…but that doesn’t look to be the undercurrent of most of what life is likely to handle us in this next little while.

Yes, for some of us this station will represent the sure and final finish to some process which has (probably) been dragging on and causing much angst. Maybe even just more burden to your schedule – whatever. I have one friend who got a languishing, lingering, really unhappy-making court matter settle as Mercury went into retrograde and the paperwork will now be settling out. The issue which brought about that lawsuit is finally over. As soon as the last envelope finds its file, the entire matter begins to melt away into memory.

That’s the sort of ‘before’ which dissolves now, leaving room for…

….well, that’s up to you. Once Neptune goes direct, our lives can become however much more we want them to be. They can grow and blossom and expand to include vistas only before suspected until now.

For that to happen, all we have to do is learn to tolerate more of life than we deal with now. We have to be willing to experience it and then (as if that’s not enough) also be willing to think it through and learn something, from which we release our boundaries on what can or “should” be.
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From an Astrologer's Notebook: Shut Downs National and Personal

The dome of the US Capitol at night in Washington DC

(photo credit: Florian Hirzinger, August 2010)

In case you didn't hear, the US government shut down. The last time this happened was back in the Clinton Era, and America survived that...so it's likely the country (and the world) will survive this.

The astrological question however, is why did this happen at this particular time?

For that, we look to the national chart - of which, when it comes to the US of A, there are many. Which is which and why which is used by whoever is a whole debate which goes on (rather endlessly) in the astrological community. Suffice it to say, however, the chart that this astrologer uses is that which is erected for the signing of a peace treaty by General Robert E. Lee in the tiny town (if you could have properly called it a town in those days) of Appomattox Courthouse, Virginia.

In other words, Chart USA - which is the only chart I know of which works by transit and return and whatever else, come what may - is the chart of the reunification of the United States at the end of the Civil War.

The keyword there is "reunification," a term which implies - accurately - that the country had broken apart. About the time that the Confederacy had written its own constitution, set up its own government and started printing its own money (it does always come down to money when you're talking nations, doesn't it?)...that 'terminated' the original 1776 compact...union...whatever you want to call it.

If you want to read more chapters and more verses on this, go to the blog sidebar and look under the list of national and political posts for 'Chart USA' posts. There's a bunch of them.

So this is Chart USA - the Appomattox Surrender Chart:

Chart USA (Appomattox Surender)

April 9, 1865 - 3:53 p.m. (LMT/+5:15) - Appomattox VA

Without belaboring the fact that this economics snafu has been long in the making, what we would be seeing during the course of this political season is a really sterling (ugh) example of the national Pluto conjunct Mercury in an Aries 8th house with both planets posited in Taurus.

Mercury is at 9 Taurus and Pluto is at 12 Taurus, both in premier position to be smacked by opposition by the November Solar Eclipse at 11 Scorpio.

That 11 Scorpio eclipse is in the nation's 2nd house - the house of security and 'our resources' (which would include money) but the effects are rather wide ranging. For one, the sign on the 2nd house where the eclipse is actually hitting is Libra. And Libra is ruled by Venus. The Venus of this chart is at 24 Taurus and the 9th house, a condition which tells us that this fight...and its repercussions do have widespread effects and that some of them will not be localized. In a national chart, any 3rd decanate placement (which is to say, anything positioned in the last ten degrees of any sign) is going to apply to 'them as well.' "They" will have input and opinions of what "we" or "I" do - in this case the 'we/I' thing being America.

In other words, with this Venusian 'ruling effect' coming from the 9th house, from education and media (both 9th house things) and in the international quadrant (the 9th being the house of all things 'foreign') the USA's actions are going to engender reactions in all those 9th house areas (media, foreign whatevers, etc.).

More close up, one would suppose is the fact that by being at 11 Scorpio, the eclipse is hitting both asteroid Industria (at 7 Scorpio) and the national 3rd house cusp - which rather brings up the whole 'what are they thinking?' reaction which has been heard from coast to coast (and abroad, as far as that goes).

Industria, in this notion, can be the effect on the nation's economy - and by Venusian implication - the international economy (which is to say, economies around the world). Being that solar eclipses have a 3-year 'evolution,' this is not any quick fix or quick dip in the economic shark tank, either.

Scorpio on the 3rd house tends to be insistent. Stubborn. The instinct is to try to get your own way, and why that would be - the plus and minus there - would be told through the rulers of Scorpio: Mars and Pluto. Mars is the 'choice' of what to do, not do, get involved with, deny, invest in or be 'operated' by when it comes to the pure Scorpio dynamic.

And in this chart, Mars is in Cancer (ouch) and the 10th house of government and world affairs. Mars in Cancer is Mars in a position to be insistent, sometimes to its own detriment. The Mars/Cancer effect generally stems from some sort of fear, and with Cancer being ruled by the Moon we look to the chart's Moon (which is in Libra, conjunct Black Moon Lilith and involving Black Hole M87)...and plainly that points to constituencies, political pressures and (Lilith) back room deals and other such things.

Meanwhile (back at the national ranch), the Pluto of this chart is sitting with Mercury in Taurus in a Mars ruled 8th house. What this rather tells us - because of the Mars ruling the effects/affects of this house - is that the US is perfectly willing to be badly behaved and even willing to discredit itself in the name of its (Venus in the rhetorical and theoretical 9th ruling the 2nd house of security and satisfaction with one's self) desire to do what it believes in...otherwise known as 'serving one's own purpose.'

So...what should we expect? We should expect a lot of 'pragmatism be damned!' and getting away with whatever can be gotten away from on the part of the nation as a nation - and specifically on the part of those who are in charge of doing the governing. The US of A is a nation which is willing to go out on any limb for what it believes in...and only once the (Plutonic) effects and outcomes hit does the nation respond. 

Call it 'clean up' mode. There are nations, just as there are people, who will just follow that theory right off a fifty story building only to do the 'uh-oh' thing as they plummet towards ground.

It's a trait.

Fortunately for Americans, the Pluto/Mercury in Taurus - once energized by a crisis, does well. But prior to that...? Uh, not so much. With Photographica ("the image") and Sabine ("being held captive by") conjunct Pluto and Mercury, we get the notion that until there IS some sort of crisis, the US will hold onto its theories and debate itself into a pickle barrel.

Perhaps also worth noting is the 2013 return on this chart...

Chart USA - Solar Return 2013

April 9, 2013  - 1:28 p.m. (EDT/+4) - Appomattox, VA

And oh...lookie there...! The 8th house natal is the 10th house solar, putting the issue of debt and finance right out there for all the world to see. Moreover, with the Midheaven (aka MC) at 23 Aries, Venus is exactly conjunct. So all that stuff we said about the 2nd house and Venus in the natal 9th and Industria will be affected - put that in BIG AND BOLD.

Incidentally, Industria doesn't only mean that government workers will be involved OR that the people working for (or as) the government will be the ones to set off the solar eclipse (or embody it, depending on how you think). No, this is also about 'work force' dynamics. And that natal Industria is very much in opposition to natal Mercury in Chart USA may give us the real clue about why and when this current shut down and the debt ceiling conversation soon to follow will get resolved.

Oh, there's nothing like debt to stir up an 8th house! And here it is, poised on the 10th house of governance. Issue...meet issue makers!

Et voila...the rationale for the problem.

But wait....! That's not all. Statistically speaking, the degrees which sit just before any angle are very powerful. So that puts Eris at 22 Aries, Mars at 21 Aries and the chart's Sun at 20 Aries right there to spoil for the honor of being most in the spotlight and most prone to thinking 'in the moment.'

The Sun in this solar return rules the Leo Ascendant. And with Circe sitting just behind that Ascendant, the (Leo) idea of the thing is spellbinding enough to reduce intelligence to mental myopia. That Circe is positioned at 2 Leo in the solar chart says it will "pick up" on natal Kleopatra at 4 Leo in the natal chart (with, for that matter, natal Kleopatra right under the solar Ascendant). Kleopatra was a very, very smart woman. But in the end, her cleverness drove her to a situation which somewhat bent to this purpose would refer to being a 'poisonous pain in the asp.'

(Yes, you can quote me.)

The closest planet/dwarf planet in this chart - which is to say the highest planet/dwarf planet in this return chart is Eris. And that tells us that disruption and discord will reign until such time as someone in government decides to make the (Midheaven) world a better place instead of just trying to prove their (Aries) point or have their (Aries) way.

Oh, and let's not forget that Pluto in 6. In a national chart, the 6th house is the house of its 'employee's and those who do the nation's business. So Pluto in that house, in an inconjunct to an intercepted Gemini Jupiter in the 11th house of income, social/societal thinking and social systems is a pretty darn good image of Congress not giving a graham cracker whether they screw up national functionality as well as their ability to not care whether they injure the income of a whole lot of people.

Put simply, Gemini is the sign of communication and thought. To have Gemini intercepted in the 11th in that inconjunct to Pluto is a perfect image of Congress just not 'hearing' what people are saying not just about them, but about what they're doing.

And let us not forget - Pluto is the 'outcome' ruler of Scorpio, as in "Scorpio solar eclipse." This Pluto in 6 with its attendant inconjunct is thus a perfect image of consequences and repercussions. 

The bottom line here is that this solar eclipse - like all solar eclipses - brings enormous focus to given subjects, wherever they may fall in our chart. (Or charts, should you want to also use your solar return and/or any applicable lunar return...and so on). Especially with a sign like Scorpio involved, we will tend to want to cling to some position or some sense of 'safety' or some notion even if we do so at some peril.

Solar eclipses are famous...yea verily infamous...for bringing out what really is funky and unworkable. In Scorpio, that 'thing' tends to be something we don't want others to know.

Heck, we don't even want to know such things about our Self.

We think (or know) they won't like us if we're honest... and that we'll have emotional hell to pay if we're honest with ourselves. It's all just a reflection of our shame or our fears or our insecurities with self - all of which are engendered when we refuse to grow, change, evolve and deal with our (Scorpio) emotions and the emotionality of life coolly, realistically and factually. With Scorpio, there is some tendency to glom onto ideals and forget the realities - the human cost, to ourselves and to others - for our trying to be 'perfect.'

Human perfection isn't theory. Human perfection is the process of being perfectly human, folks.

If we take our clue from the media (of which there is plenty of these days) it would seem to be that the 'Rule of Scorpio' which is to say, owning the truth calmly and factually and choosing to share that truth calmly and out of choice is the best way forward. Yes, there may be a moment of shock or dismay. But...

Washington Monument (photo credit: Snty-tact, July 2006)

....well, I'll just toss in here something from my own very human past. I used to be a gym rat. Health has kind of driven me away from that, though I still love grappling with weights and 'heavy feedback' (of all kinds, apparently!) Anyway...at once point I was invited by a friend of the day to work out at the very famous Gold's Gym in Venice Beach, California. And there, among the body buffniks and pro athletes, I soon found myself being cheered on by a bunch of pro wrestlers.

If you've ever seen pro wrestling, you know what I'm taking about - a bunch of guys who, if they know the word 'shy' certainly don't subscribe to it.

So there was very imperfect me, all gung ho but not anywhere near as fit as these guys, tackling the pig iron and going through my workout with these wrestlers standing around me urging me on with cries of  "JUST ONE MORE!!...GO FOR IT!!...YOU CAN DO IT!!"...and the like.

I finally asked one of them why they were being so supportive of someone who was plainly not in their class.

Their answer: "because you're here, and you're trying."

That's what Scorpio asks us to do. Scorpio asks us to try to be the better, braver - hopefully calmer and more 'think it through' person. Scorpio asks us to choose our friends, our associates and our efforts wisely, to recognize who we can trust, who we'd be a fool to trust, and to not get towed off track by what we don't know so that common sense - and human values (including the value of humans) - doesn't go out the window and thereafter return to haunt us, taunt us, and over time, undermine us.

Scorpio tempts us to think in response terms. Or reward terms. The temptation is to think in terms of power instead of self-respect. Scorpio will tempt us to deceive and not be honest about who we are and who we have been - most often to our own detriment.

Where we are blindly over OR under invested (in any sense) a Scorpio solar eclipse will explode those boundaries and barriers - particularly as it hits our Scorpio placements (should we have any). We will be asked and then forced to learn that we need to be trying, even when that's a very trying experience. The 'why?' here is obvious: life seeks to show us that we cannot live a depleted existence or a compartmentalized existence, that we are contiguous with ourselves and others.

You know...because of the E=mc2'd of it all.

And yes, sometimes we have to let go in order to hold on. The question is why and how we go about doing that. Scorpio is an intimate sign, so the public stuff, the outer stuff - and thus the money and prestige stuff - that's what tends to get in our way on the path to being the actual person we want to be.

So...

In that light (and on that note), the second half of this post is a form of personal "shut down" notice. No, I'm not stopping the blog - don't fret! This is more 'personally personal' than that.

As much as Scorpio is the sign of economics and debt and power struggles and intimacy and emotional conflicts big and small (from relationship trials to wars), there is also a very physical side to Scorpio which goes way beyond sex. Think through this list of Scorpio keywords: rehabilitation, detoxification, reconstruction, reclamation, purification, elimination.

For my solar eclipse, I'm up to a whole list of things. But then that's fitting, as this eclipse will conjunct my Scorpio Saturn/Moon while trining my Pisces Venus and Mercury. In short, a whole lot of chart factors, a whole lot doing in my life.

The Saturn part of this talks about what I'm doing to grow in an obvious and external manner quite consistent with Saturn being in the upper (public) half of my chart. It's also in the "thou" 7th house, which (all puns intended) 'speaks' to who I am with others and what I put out to others...and in this blog or any other work product or effort I make.

So it's apt that I'm in the middle of setting up publication of a four-volume epic fantasy. (Think "Lord of the Rings" if it had been written in a modern time with modern characters dealing with modern problems in a modern voice). This represents plural decades of work coming to fruition (which in Saturn representing duration and dedication seems apt). Plus I went into the production process to get these books into print just as I finished my year-long Saturn return.

All very fitting - and you can look for a release in the next few months. (I'll post an announcement here, on Facebook and LinkedIn when it happens.)

But there's another thing on my plate as well - on the 'who am I (the person) that I am putting out there? side of the coin. This concerns a medical process which in metaphysical terms is my 'eclipsing' a medical status in the purely Scorpio sense.

I want to be a better, less toxic me...which involves doing a detox. As noted above, any sort of 'detoxifying' is Scorpionic whether you're getting off some drug or refusing to go into some environment (like a home or some office) you find toxic.

Scorpio - as a process - is often about 'cleaning out' our life, our fears and any basis of relating or operating which is toxic, be that physical, emotional, sexual, financial, spiritual or otherwise. It can involve dealing with toxic waste, doing psychological work or utilizing any other form or format which activates the Scorpio 'reclamation,' 'tear down/build back' theme.

(Come to think of it, every part of that list applies to Congress...)

"Addiction" per se is astrologically thought of as Neptunian and Piscean. And yes, I am a Sun sign Pisces, which would tend to say my physical being is more prone to addiction than some - and you have no idea of the arguments I've gone through with MDs who have handed me plainly addictive prescriptions which I have then handed back saying things like 'I'm not in favor of addiction - are you?'...or the even more blatant 'Thanks, but I'm trying not to follow in Heath Ledger's footsteps.' 

That aside, when we talk about Pisces/Neptune addiction, we're generally talking about an addiction which grows out of some urge to escape, whether that's from life or physical or emotional pain.

At least that's where it starts. And it doesn't have to involve drugs. Wherever Pisces falls in your chart, that's the area of life which points to what you will tend to try to escape from, escape to or use as your medium of escape. (And sometimes all of the above are the very same thing.) I have a friend with Pisces on the 4th house who treats their home (and their office within the office complex) as their sanctuary and refuge. We all do that to some extent, but this person does it with such obvious 'flight' tendencies that the area around their (closed) office door vibrates like some energetic Hazmat zone.

In adult life they are flee the inability to tolerate feeling they were brought up as a child to avoid. And yes, childhood (as the experience of family) is also 4th house.

Pisces is a sign about our experiencing of our own  emotionality, emotional connections and the commonalty of human emotional experience, corporeal and otherwise. We often try to control our Pisces experience through escape when the answer is more about accepting how messy and imperfect - and yes, sometimes painful life really is.

We want the ideal. We want the dream. In Scorpio, we try to avoid invalidating the person inside ourselves who needs and wants that dream in order to feel better about life in general and in Pisces we try to escape feeling anything which hurts...which is why we manufacture that dream 'nirvana' in the first place.

Apply that to me and we get to a fact you already know if you've been around the blog long enough - namely that my sketchy (read: violent) early history has endowed me with all the anxieties and non-joys known as PTSD.

About seven years ago an enterprising MD put me on the medication I now need to stop. It was for PTSD and I didn't really fight it. I should have. But sometimes we have to learn the hard way. And that 'hard way' began for me when about three years ago I found out how unless you're fatally ill, you probably shouldn't take this medication but for a rather short amount of time.

NOW you tell me? Oh, great...

 Just in case you're into pharmaceuticals, no, this isn't

a photograph from any personal source!

I've tried all the common ways of trying to get weaned off this medication - all with stunningly bad results.And no, for the sake of the curious, I haven't abused my prescription.

Taking this all into metaphysics-speak we get yet another freaky example of Scorpio energetics and the 'use the energy wisely, lest it use you unwisely' lesson. I'm a Sun sign Pisces with a Scorpio Moon: I didn't abuse the drug but the drug has abused me.

So I get to do a detox...which may go just fine, but which (let's be real...!) may also not be a picnic in the park.

Full disclosure here...it probably hasn't been a picnic for people who know me in real time of late either.

Why? Well, for the last month or two I've been walking the edge of withdrawal. It's because of duration on the drug. Our bodies (which are amazing machines) learn to acclimate. So as you take many drugs, they do less and less...resulting in doctors amping up the amount of drug you take.

True to form however, given my stubborn little self, I simply refused to - as they say - "titer up." In part it's because I'd have to double the dose to change it at all (which sounds to me like a stunningly bad idea)...and since I've known this detox thing was coming, I've clung to my (maintenance) dose, even though of late I've been getting twinges of all those (very not cute) withdrawal symptoms which, as with most withdrawals had a way of turning me into one very anxious squirrel at emotionally provocative moments.

People in withdrawal just tend to be edgy and PTSD people in withdrawal tend to be very fight-and-flight prone. 

Yes, most people do 'fight or flight'...PTSD people tend to do fight and flight.

It's very decorative. (Not!)

Since I'm the child-abuse PTSD person and not the military grade PTSD person, the good news is that I don't shoot guns. But yes, I am a writer (surely you've noticed, right?) So I do tend to shoot my mouth off - most often when the mere idea of something scary scares me into trying to ward the scary thing off...Which usually makes it happen, yes.

Ah, life is so self fulfilling!

And once I manage to elicit exactly the thing I dread, I do what child abuse victims do - I go right to being childlike. (I'm guessing those on the receiving end call it childish.) In other words, I cry.

In fact, I have a PhD in weepery. (That's a joke, yes. But also not so much of a joke - also yes.)

I know...you're sitting there reading this and trying to envision your shiny-brained astrologer acting like a child. It happens, trust me. And people in real time have no better time with it than you're having imagining it - though I do have a few friends who know that no matter what happens, scared kids need hugs and reassurance and security.

So like everybody else who has been scared early and thoroughly, I freak out, I cry some (sometimes a lot) and then I...well...I guess you could say I 'sober up' and return to being the shiny-brained astrologer and generally glib girl most people think of me as.

Confession over. And now that you know much PTSD stuff you probably never thought you'd read on an astrological blog (though to be honest, having been abused is part of what led me to learning astrology)...on to the practical: for reasons classed as 'all of the above' I may be taking a couple of weeks away from the blog. As of today I will be setting it to 'automatic,' so you can still post comments. That way, if I do step away, a friend will step in to play monitor and delete anything off-color or off-track even if I won't be answering until I come back online, which at first guess will be...oh, after the first week of November.

In other words, until after the solar eclipse - at which time I'll catch up with comments, love notes and 'atta girls' left in the interim.

Whether or not I take time off, the process is akin to shutting down in order to clean up. I'm pulling back on the Scorpio interactivity side of things in order to reclaim and rebuild inside so as to be a better person to you...and myself as well.

Since I haven't jumped into the detox pool (it looks muddy) yet, I'm not sure how deep the water is going to be. Maybe all will be fine. But in any case, not to worry - posts will be pre-loaded to let you know what's going on. Therefore the worst case scenario is this: though you may miss my saucy Piscean presence, you'll remain informed on metaphysical doings.

I trust you understand.

 The glyph for Pisces

I also want to say that I'm telling you all of this not because I have some need to go public (I so don't follow that habit) but because I thought it would be a whole difference kind of good example of how solar eclipses - in particular a Scorpio solar eclipse - can work.

Positive things can come of whatever this eclipse brings, but the process of working through the whole of the eclipse's lesson can be difficult, challenging, trying, scary and ugly.

And let's not forget...eclipses have stages. First comes the 'pre-eclipse' break down of various things in our life. GIven that this eclipse is in Scorpio, the effect may appear to be external, but the real issue is internal.

Life is trying to get us all to learn something vital...and the closer this eclipse is to hitting anything in your chart squarely, the more basic or bigger the lesson is. As we often see with celebrities, politicians and such, eclipses frequently "out" us - or what we've been doing or hiding.

Particularly from ourselves.

Once the date of the actual eclipse passes, then we move into a 'coping' phase where we deal with whatever has happened and continue processing in present tense (i.e., what I need to do on a daily basis) as we (hopefully) also do a little contemplation of what this event - whatever it may be - is trying to 'tell' us in terms of who we really are, or should be.

Somewhere down the line...call it between two and two and a half years from now, those of us who have had a solid 'hit' from the eclipse (that would be me raising my hand, yes) will come across something or some situation or some person we would never have appreciated or 'known' was important had we not been through this time. 

But yes, eclipses can be a giant headache - literally and otherwise.

With that said, back to the book. As happy as I am about finally getting this book into print, there's also an aspect of wistfulness about it. My cousin likened this feeling to having children grow up and leave home. With the 'missing' of having something all to yourself is the understanding that an 'era' of your existence has come to its end.

And a new one begins, which brings us to the idea of how scary change can really be. It's no less scary to think of thinking of life in a new way at the governmental level than it is on an individual level. It's scary to think that the family you grew up with taught you things which now as an adult are crippling your life.

But at some point, we have to change. So just as I understand how many simply refuse to allow me to be anything but a titanium-minded computer who does astro-analysis at the drop of a diode (apparently I'm a clone of Commander Data) I also understand how hard it is for politicians to do what's right instead of what's popular.

I have seen wholesale bizarreness happen over the past few weeks and I bet you have too. My least favorite was the person who told me something was "illegal" when it plainly wasn't. They should never try such lines on someone prone to looking things up. (I'm a born research geek.)

By it happens. The Pisces in me wants to think they 'just don't know the truth' while my Scorpio Moon side suspects they're copping out. (Read: manipulate the situation, and 'manipulation' is a Scorpio word.)Or worse yet, that they've been lied to by someone trying to control them. (Control: another Scorpio word.)

Ah yes...so many questions, so little true and truly trusting and intimate communication of the Scorpio kind - the kind which challenges us to risk so we can grow. So many of us are so afraid of losing that we give up the chance to win.

Isn't that so often the way of humankind?

The glyph for Scorpio

 

But I understand why all of this is at stake and taking place. I understand the parameters of the Scorpio eclipse coming upon us, and the fact that it's going to affect each and every one of us in our own very special and equally trying way. (With that going double, yes, for anyone with planets, dwarf planets, nodes or axis points in Scorpio.) I comprehend our fears. I sympathize with our universal desire for comfort and security, however we define that for ourselves. 

Being human is seriously difficult. But what's our choice?

The old Zen master's saying...walk on...seems to apply here. And I hope that those who object to my vulnerabilities will, in spite of their preferences, choose to walk the road through life with me anyway.

And if they don't...for those who must walk their own paths for their own reasons, I wish them well and hope they can find it in their hearts to forgive me my very human and physical mortal failings even if they choose to follow a different...and probably equally challenging path.

We are in a time of shifting mortal energetics. And if I've learned anything as an astrologer it's that where Scorpio is concerned, hiding is a toxicity which corrodes, especially when we do it to evade our own fear.

Scorpio fears are about as toxic as toxic gets on the metaphysical level. And the power of that toxicity is in the fear, the secret, the denial and the unwillingness to believe you can live through whatever happens even if others don't like who you are or what you've done.

What's your choice - to live a lie? To deny that which would allow you to experience the greatest depths of your human self?

That's Scorpio at its most ineffectual.

I've compared Scorpio to ice (i.e., fixed water - which is what Scorpio is astrologically) many a time. To lie is thin ice. To own one's mortality and humanity and willingness to try in spite of our flaws... that's the ice which though perhaps not all slick and shiny is solid enough to walk on.

So there are a few comments on the eclipse and the US government...and my process of eclipsing that which I have been. Eclipses tend to bring out the worst like some overflowing sewer...and the worst of it seems to be looking at ourselves.

Whatever it takes for life to get us to let go, life will hand us. If we refuse to let go now, in 19 years (one Metonic or eclipse cycle) we will encounter the same process but at higher magnitude (as they say here in earthquake country) and with more devastating effects.

At some level the question is not can you hold on...but why would you want to?

And that's where the 'fixation' of Scorpio's gives way to transformation. Scorpio often manifests as wanting to be right when the better solution is getting it right - and 'right' is not what it looks like, but an intrinsic quality of unique individuality we each must find on our own.
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The Libra New Moon: Taking a Stand, Fighting Our Self

It will be just 36 minutes after midnight on October 5th in the UT/+0 zone when the New Moon occurs. This will be the last New Moon before November’s solar eclipse and the beginning of the lunation which will set off the ‘revving up’ which will lead to a Lunar Eclipse on October 18th.

That lunar eclipse will occur at 25 Aries, which is one thing we should consider here because Libra-to-Aries is a direct opposition. So this cycle – or at least the first half of this lunation cycle – has a distinct “I/thou” quality. You may experience that in relationships…or how you relate to someone or something going on in the world or your world.

Or in how you conceive of your world and how it works. Because this New Moon begins this experience in Libra, we know the essence of the issue is ‘how to get the results I want to get?’ whether from others or some situation…which is pretty much offset by ‘who am I in this transaction?’ – be that a human transaction, a business transaction, an emotional, financial or experiential transaction.

Yes, we’re in the wonderful world of ‘cause-effect’…otherwise known as what you put out comes back to you. Some would immediately think of this as karma, though your local (or not-so-local, depending on where you are) metaphysician tends to think karma differs from cause-effect. Cause-effect is pretty ‘directional,’ if you will – I talk to you, you talk to me. The actor performs for the audience, the audience applauds or boos.

One of the interesting things about Libra which doesn’t get talked about much…(and which applies not only to whatever house Libra falls on in your chart but also as something of an ‘undercurrent’ with regards to the 7th house of any chart no matter what sign is on its cusp)…is also the idea that Libra is not just about peaceful relationships. Or loving relationships. One of the keywords in the long Libra list is ‘open enemies’…so plainly Libra is not just a sign of cupcakes and roses.

My point about karma is that karma – which is associated with Scorpio (not Libra) doesn’t necessarily come from the direction in which you’re headed. Or which you are addressing yourself to. Karma is the emotive, the energetic side of experience. So you may do good or nasty thing (Call it “Act A”) in one place and the energetic of that emotional intent …which in true Scorpio style you may be owning OR you may be choosing to be in denial about…that will just come around through something entirely different.

With that said, Libra-Scorpio-Sagittarius is the full spectrum of the 3rd zodiacal quadrant. And that tells us that Libra – an air sign – is where we get into the idea of the thing BEFORE we commit ourselves emotionally, or commit ourselves through any of many means which in meaning something to us (or which has meaning to us) creates an emotional relationship.

And that’s what really is so tricky about Scorpio…in Scorpio the emotional relationship is complex where in the theoretical ‘idea of it’ Libra realm, things are pretty simplistic. I have a friend with major placements in both Libra and Scorpio who is forever getting in trouble because they don’t WANT to deal with the fact that the natural progression of any process…be it human or business or whatever…goes from the (Libra) idea of the thing and the talking it through into the Scorpio realm of ‘things at stake’ which they get all kerfluffled up about.

But that’s the process. Trying to avoid part of the zodiacal process…any part of the zodiacal process…by definition is limiting yourself to only getting as far as you’re willing to go.

So this person (who is one of my many Scorpio Moon friends) has a TERRIBLE time with relationships. No, they don’t have to be intimate. Anything personal…and that can be business personal or personal-personal gets them into a quagmire – not so much with the other person as their ability or willingness to take on their own feelings on the subject. And because they choose the Scorpio denial route, they end up creating no end of hassles for themselves and in essence, bogging themselves down IN the very sign dynamic they want to get past.

This is all really important to us now as we move into this Libra New Moon and this Libra-Aries New-to-Full Moon process. Since Aries is the sign of ‘I am’ and all things consciously ourselves, these weeks ahead are going to be full of situations and experiences which bring home to us (that would be the Libra-TO-Aries process) what the ‘who we are being’ (our Libra presentation, our Libra choices of who to deal with or prioritize or listen to, etc.) is…and whether that’s working for us.

Or even if we really like ourselves being that person.

As I say that, let’s keep in that Libra/Scorpio difference in mind, however. Why? Because this Libra New Moon of October 5th (or 4th, for those in the Americas) is the start of the process which is going to carry our Libra concepts and conceptualizations into the wonderful if catabolic world of November’s Scorpio Solar Eclipse.

Solar eclipses are fascinating, no question. And the focus of any solar eclipse is of major astrological concern – again, no question. But the way that solar eclipses tend to function in real life and our real world life involves an ‘eclipse-flavored’ lead in (which I tend to refer to as the ‘breaking down’ period) which through testing us shows up the weaknesses or the fallacies – or yes, the denials – which we have bought into in our lives. What the solar eclipse does is force us to relinquish the false front, the cover-up, the ‘making do’ and the compromises of Self we’ve bought into in order to bring us closer to being who we were born to be to begin with.

You know, before parents and life styles and materialism and corporate advertising and our peer group pressures – before any of that got to us.

The incoming eclipse is Scorpionic. So it’s seriously emotional. It’s evocative and provocative and no doubt people in your world are stirring you up even as they feel stirred up and everybody is going stir crazy under the pressure.

Ultimately the question is all about self worth of a type which asks whether you would respect yourself if you met you. Or would you say ‘that guy has such potential, but he’s selling himself short’ or ‘that woman has every opportunity to do good in this world and instead she’s just thinking of herself.’

(Yes, these two examples have leapt to mind for a reason in my world…but they’re entirely valid, nonetheless!)

Scorpio exhibits itself through power games – so wherever you’re trying to grasp power or exert power over others, that’s the place to look first.

And the reason why I say ‘over others’ is because this month’s ‘phase in the eclipse breaking down process’ is colored by Libra. So we know this is about the idea of who we are being to others – which given the eclipse, they’re likely to be letting us have an earful about!

Another note worth touching on, before we move right along: Libra is the signature dynamic of Gen X (October 1971-April 1972; end of July 1972-early November 1983; late May 1984-late August 1984)…and Scorpio is the signature dynamic of Gen Y: early November 1983 through mid-May 1984 (plus) end of August 1984 through early November 1995.

Gen Y – as a whole – is under an enormous amount of ‘strip-down’ pressure which is aimed at trying to get this generation to get more ‘real’ in a universal sense. Gen Y is challenged by the need to balance their emotional knowing-of-self with knowing and honoring others at THEIR emotional levels. Gen Y was born to live a long and full life of not just ‘power brokering’ or negotiating for what they want, but a life which embraces the ability and willingness to be vulnerable to others on a level which engenders respect.

Really powerful people are vulnerable because real strength knows it can survive no matter what is thrown into their court. This doesn’t mean strong people don’t express themselves. This doesn’t mean the strong person doesn’t say ‘ugh!’ or ‘I’m not having anything CLOSE to a good time!’…in fact, quite the opposite.

Real emotional strength is only present when we are able to own, display and share our weaknesses…and that’s an important step in the process of being human.

This lunation is bringing home to us either the challenges or the things we need to work on…or maybe some new insights on how we’re getting in our own way because of our approach. Through the Libra situation or the Libra interaction or the Libra ‘message from the other’ (business, personal or otherwise) we are being told where we need to look.

And yes, the easiest thing to do is to project and say ‘that’s their problem.’ That’s a classic Libra response – hardly anything is MORE classically Libra, as a matter of fact!

Let's be real here...‘they’ may indeed have a problem. In which case…what is stopping you from helping them understand that problem? That doesn’t mean yelling at them or walking out on them…that means exploring the (Libra) idea of the situation with them.

In the process, if you can get that far, you’re likely to learn a whole lot about yourself, too. That’s just the way things work – especially now. The fabric of time-space seems to draw particularly dense as we move through ‘eclipse season’ and because this season is about the combination of Scorpio-Aires (the Scorpio Solar Eclipse and the Aries Lunar Eclipse) these several months (September and October – leading into November) is all about the experiencing of the Self in a very vital, even primal way.

Or as a friend of mine puts it: profound…a word which strikes me as being the desire to be ‘pro-active’ about finding that thing which will make us feel ‘found.’

By whom? By our Self.

And back to that Gen X thing for a moment…above, I said this: through the Libra situation or the Libra interaction or the Libra ‘message from the other’ (business, personal or otherwise) we are being told where we need to look.

In a nutshell, that’s pretty much the core of the Gen X thing. Gen X (Pluto in Libra) creates a massive attraction to others so that through others Gen X’ers can learn who they are…and aren’t. The Plutonic tendency (which goes with Pluto’s association with Scorpio) to ‘merge’ and be ‘part of the group’ is generally the way this instinct functions. But successful Gen X’ers (which is to say, Gen X people who are successful as being their own person) in time discover who they are supposed to be as distinct from the group or as an individual which is part of some group (or profession) but who has their own very individual way of doing things which has to do with who they are as an individual and what talents and resources they bring to being who they are….that’s the Gen X ‘object.’ As Gen X’ers develop, they may or may not drift away from old friends and ‘the old group’…but as surely as Scorpio follows Libra, the Gen X’er who comes to be their own person and secure in being the person they are will in time find a group which is aligned with their inner energetic – not the sexual one or the societal one, the human one.

Learning how to be human and who they are as an individual human is a seriously Gen X thing.

The Libra New Moon

Oct 5, 2013 - 00:34 a.m. (UT +0) - Aries Wheel (Location not Specific)

So with that all now toodled and noodled, we’ll wrap up with a few astro-technicals. The degree of this New Moon is 11 Libra, a degree which by “decanate definition” (i.e., which ten degrees of the sign it falls in) is emotional. So the ideas of the moment are fervent. Or maybe really ‘important feeling.’ With the overhanging solar eclipse energetic in the air, even the most theoretical thing is going to evoke more feeling (and feelings) at the moment – so we can all expect more frustration, more elation, more dancing off on a whim and more calling people on their…um…stuff. (Yeah, we’ll go with ‘stuff’ here as the generic.)

That said, this is not a degree known for consistency, constant anything or steadiness of effort, conviction or ‘the ability to transmit.’ This last is particularly important as this New Moon also takes place  in opposition to Uranus (in Aries) – so the nervous system and “fits of nerves” (anxieties, flare-ups, etc.) are to pay attention to.

Given the opposition (Libra to Aries) that ‘flaring up’ may also signal ‘something in the air’ either literally or on a more philosophical level. Being thrown ‘off’ by something sudden or some sudden change would also not be unexpected.

This degree (11 Libra) is known to have an association with physical activities – particularly those of a sports or athletic nature. This may serve to be the venue through which other events happen (or other facets of the degree come to light) or it may simply be an interest you run hot or cold on during this period.

Responsibility – a concept often associated with Libra as a facet of “honesty” (with one’s Self as part of this world) is also stressed by this degree and problems having to do with lack of responsibility may well surface. Being that this is an opposition to Uranus in Aries, this may be your irresponsibility which is focused on, or it may be your realizing that someone else is being irresponsible.

Or at least not responsive (as a sidebar conjugation of ‘responsible’) to others. This is, after all, Libra we’re talking about, so very little is going to happen in true isolation here. Someone else is involved or implied or associated with everything, whether they’re in the room or conversation or actively involved in any specific dynamic or not.

How we treat others is also up for grabs here. By itself, 11 Libra speaks to the polarity not so much between good and evil (that’s more emotional and therefore more Scorpio-ish) but between kindness and cruelty as stemming from our regard for how we interact with others.

For whatever reason, I happen to like the Sabian Symbol for this degree very much. (And no, it’s not highlighted in my natal horoscope, so go figger.) The symbol reads like this: MINERS ARE SURFACING FROM A DEEP COAL MINE and its keynote is ‘The need to carry on at ever deeper levels the quest for knowledge which keeps burning the fires of the collective mind of a society.’

As I type that, I can’t help but think about how exactly I’ve been led to this time to be publishing my favorite manuscript of all time. It’s called ‘Reality and Mind’ and I expect it to be out in…oh….maybe a month or so, give or take. It’s ‘high’ (quest) fantasy, which a lot of you love, and it will be coming out as a series of four books – much like ‘Lord of the Rings’ is published as three books.

Ebook publishing formats having not yet caught up with what this manuscript requires, it will be out in print only – at least for a while. But that’s okay…who doesn’t like curling up with an engrossing book?

No, it’s not precisely astrological. But if you think about who wrote it, what do you think the chances are that it doesn’t have in its weaving a goodly measure of metaphysical thought?

Just sayin’…and yes, that keynote and the Sabian does remind me of this work.

More on that, later – as I get more information on when it will be available initially through Amazon and shortly thereafter through any bookstore near you.

In any case, this Sabian Symbol is plainly about ‘things coming to light’ and ideas which we have ‘dug out of the darkness.’ And yet, even while this symbol speaks to going within and digging ever deeper, it also refers to ‘surfacing’ – which is not just bringing whatever ‘jewels’ we have found to the light but our own ‘coming up for air.’

And that's a very interesting idea, particularly here at a Libra New Moon under the auspices of a Scorpio Solar Eclipse. If we understand the idea of a solar eclipse as ‘peeling away’ those layers or that part of our daily life which has hidden or prevented us from being who we really are inside…underneath…within…then this symbol makes a good deal of sense as part of a far greater metaphysical process. Astrologer Dane Rudhyar, in writing about this image, uses the term ‘EXTRACTION’ and in a sense, that’s exactly what a solar eclipse does – particularly when it hits our charts (or more exactly, points in our charts) with any exactness.

The eclipse ‘extracts’ us from the surrounding matrix of life details as surely as the miner extracts the metal or gem and brings that out – as the miner (as a person) is also extracted from the mine.

There are many layers, many facets implied here…rather like one of those sets of Matroyshka dolls where one doll fits into the next.

 Matryoshka dolls

(photo credit: Jeff BelMonte, February 2007)

Last thought…the opposition is not the only figure imaged in this Libra New Moon. That the opposition seems so vital may just be me. Or it may just be the most personal side of the configuration. But that opposition is merely half of a grand square (or grand cross) which comes with the founding of this lunation cycle.

That the Sun/Moon part of this (at 11 Libra) is conjunct Diadem (“the crowning glory”) speaks to our aims, relationships we care about and how important it is to care about the nature and quality of interactions along with who we choose to interact with.

Nemesis on the Uranian side of this configuration says we may now choose to stand up and embody some deep conviction which isn’t particularly popular…or that something we have been told or warned about comes to pass.

Industria-Pluto-Facies in Capricorn is a collage of effort and boundaries and restrictions and needs which can either frustrate us or which we can take on as the guiding principle by which we reach our goals.

And then there’s Black Moon Lilith plus Alhena/Lachesis in Cancer, a combination which starts with Alhena-Lachesis as a ‘duration of purpose’ or maybe even ‘biding our time’ against which Black Moon Lilith is a denial mechanism on a scale which goes beyond our Self. We may be doing the denying of others or society itself…or society may be ignoring us, even if we have discovered the cure for the common cold.

The trick is to hold all these thoughts in your head at the same time and to utilize them with balance and measured applications. Grand squares (aka grand crosses) are notoriously difficult – which in this month of heading into a Scorpio solar eclipse probably isn’t news to anyone. That this particular grand square is in cardinal signs (indicating action) makes this sort of a ‘taking the plunge’ sort of vibe, but being that the degrees are both in 0-9 first decan degrees (indicating something personal that we do) AND in early ‘teen degrees (indicating our feelings on or about some subject, effort, person, relationship, etc.)…that says we’re moving ahead at least with harnessing or understanding our motivations.

And then we add in a few 'other' points…

Chiron-Vesta in opposition (trine Saturn) speaks to the need to keep our commitments to ourselves…but most of all at a level which we can live with emotionally. So there’s a hint of morality, a hint of the need to care thrown in here. (As if we needed any more reminders?) But maybe even more to the point, Saturn and Vesta are each sitting in signs to either side of this New Moon’s position in Libra. And that adds a whole new layer of…well, maybe frustration. Or feeling offended… criticized… unappreciated. The semi-sextile between Saturn and the New Moon is very much about calling our priorities or values into account and considering that Saturn is very much tied up with the incoming solar eclipse, that’s likely to refer to something which is pretty darn uncomfortable.

Solution: feel your discomfort, grumble if you must - then cope with the reality. The long term reality...which is to say, the one which matters to you (honestly/Libra) as a human. 

You know, a person.

The same goes for Vesta’s semi-sextile relationship to the New Moon. Practicality is great. But who or what are you prioritizing – and is that working for you sufficiently that it ‘works’ at a level you can live with emotionally at the ‘way deep down late at night’ sort of level…never mind what anybody else says.

It’s a complicated time. But then, life isn’t supposed to be simple. If it was, we’d all be cardboard cutouts.

And we’re not.
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