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Friday, January 31, 2014

Venus: the Station





I know...ow. Just ow.

Yes - I know. Been there...doing it. Ow.

This is the start of the next three months. What we learn now - and going forward, echoes.

I have no answers for you at the moment except this is a moment to endure and learn from. As I write, the Sun is at 11 Aquarius (ON A VAST STAIRCASE STAND PEOPLE OF DIFFERENT TYPES, GRADUATED UPWARD) which seems to be the image of all we are going through at the moment which is giving us greater clarity - for good or ill - about where we stand with ourselves wherever we have gotten to in life.

Within a couple of hours the Sun will move into 12 Aquarius, the Sabian symbol for which is A BAROMETER...which is keynoted as 'the ability to discover basic natural facts that allow us to plan in advance for action.'

We're at a checkpoint - a point at which we look at the barometer and 'read' our pressures personal and external, considering as we do how it would seem a painful truth that human beings never let go of comfort or that desire to humor themselves or some cherished vanity until sheer need overcomes unwillingness.

That effect and concept will now deepen and move towards coloring central considerations as the weekend turns into next week, as Sedna goes on station, and as our capacity for greater perspective (or the lack of same) becomes that which governs critical choices leading to this year's external challenges and those realizations which amount to internalized success.

Other than that, this Venus retrograde almost became my death knell. Yes, it was an accident, but the whole affair made it very plain to me that what we don't know can indeed kill us - and that there are both prices to be paid for such ignorance...and clarity about what's worth anything which just maybe can't be learned any other way.

In any case, I hope these weeks were reasonably kind to you and yours. Going forward, what kind of human we want to be...as opposed to why we know we've been that person we are now...that's grist for our mill going forward.

And I wish us the very best with that.

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EDIT/UPDATE: From the emails I'm getting, I need to say a bit more - most of which falls under the general title "SCRAWLS FROM DETOX."

Come to think of it, it's worth saying. What happened is this: after I was told to 'go forth and detox' by all the Los Angeles MDs, I looked the drug up to see if there were any known 'side effects' which came with detox.

On that rather benign looking list was 'loss of appetite' and 'anorexia' - the latter of which my brain filed under "not in this life."

Seriously...once I got out of the house and had access to food I was fine about eating. Until I began detox, that is.

Let's just say I lost my appetite, which at first was fine. But then...well...I didn't get hungry, so...

Moral: what you don't know can kill you. There was a very sobering moment when a woman out begging looked at me and said 'are you going to make it?'

It was about then that I realized something was wrong.

Like I say...what you don't know can kill you. Food being a Venusian thing, this whole episode strikes me as strangely karmic as it strikes me as wholly Venus retrograde.

When I say that any retrograde can force you to get in touch with that 'quality' (like food, like nutrition) on the inside, that's how a retrograde works.

(No, some retrogrades aren't all that friendly.)

I'm okay. Venus is going station-direct at the top of my chart so I'll go with the idea that I'm simply owning this experience in public. Maybe by my doing that, you or someone you love will never go through anything like this.

And that would be good. :)
 
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Thanks for your emails and expressions of care. I really appreciate them. Grazi.

- Boots


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6 comments:

  1. so glad you're ok! Hope you got your appetite back now......

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    1. I gather this will go on yet for a couple of months (yes, I know) - but who knew how important feeling hungry is? I had no idea you can be just fine right up to the moment when you aren't fine - that sort of 'endurance to the end' always amazes me about the human body. I also thought it was about the oddest example of Pluto/Venus retrograde I could imagine.

      If you find my appetite, will you mail it back to me please?

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  2. I have it.....I'll give it back to you on the 16th.

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  3. remember Karen Carpenter? Be careful!

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    1. Different...or at least from what I know of Karen Carpenter's situation, different. As I understand it, she had a more or less 'true' case of anorexia, not a chemical imbalance due to withdrawing a drug which manifests as a form of anorexia - which I found out just the other day is a term for ANY amount of large weight loss due to loss of appetite. (Who knew? Not me.) My lesson...which is so incredibly Venus Rx/Pluto is that I can't rely on the "attractiveness" or "attraction" power of food to get me 'hooked' on eating it - the loss of hunger thing. Venus as food and Pluto as a force for destruction...that's a combination I have never run into before. Now that I'm aware of what the problem is I can try to deal with it on some sort of regimented or 'thinking' way...but I will admit - it still seems odd to eat when you're not hungry. We get indoctrinated with 'don't, don't, don't' on that subject and it takes a lot of 'really?' for me - with myself - to get past that. I guess we get to see how strong my intellect really is now!

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