...

Monday, September 10, 2012

Our Personal Stars (Me and My Regulus)




 This is a picture taken in 1970 from the window of my dorm room at
Swiss boarding school. The lake is Lake Geneva (aka Lac
Leman) and the rainbow ends in the town of Evian (yes, the
one from whence comes the water) at the foot of the French Alps.




From time to time people ask me if I spend a lot of time working with my own chart. You must know everything in advance…is one comment I hear now and again. Then there’s my (least) favorite: how come if you’re such a hot-shot astrologer your life isn’t perfect?

That’s a bit like asking a meteorologist why predicting the hurricane doesn’t keep them dry (and keep their hair from getting mussed up) when they walk out in one.
Knowledge is power. But as the old saying goes, you can’t fool Mother Nature! There are simply passages we all have to go through which aren’t so fun.

When we’re little, parents soothe us and say ‘don’t worry honey, they’re just growing pains.’ When we get big, we’re supposed to just suck it up.

Quite honestly, I’m not so good at sucking it up. For me, being an astrologer is in fact sort of boggling: I know the metaphysical concept but it still hurts. It’s still frustrating. Life is still a bit of a bitch.

(Okay, let’s be real…sometimes more than a bit!)

We all have our ways of coping with such things. Me, I’m a cry-er. My friends know that I have a few basic mottos, one of which is ‘when in doubt, cry.’ My natal chart has six (out of ten) ‘standard’ planets in water and a Saturn-conjunct-Moon skating personally thin ice in Scorpio. So crying works for me. I get it out, I express myself (sometimes loudly) and what happens after that happens.

Fortunately I’m drip dry and color fast. (Unfortunately I’m not wrinkle free, but that’s a different and sort of Saturn-Venus issue.)

Anyway…the point of this blog post is really that I did find myself thinking about my natal chart the other night. And suddenly it hit me.

What hit me? My Regulus factor hit me.

Before we go any further, here’s a clip from my chart:








Of note in this snippet is the idea that my Regulus is at 29 Leo, exactly conjunct Kleopatra, one degree off Pallas at 28 Leo…and one degree off Deucalion at 0 Regulus.

29 Leo is a degree which is about ‘the order of things’ in life. Obviously as twenty-nine degrees of any sign it has an urgent (some would say compulsive quality). In Leo, it points to the Self in the sense of what we think of our Self and what we do with that Self.

Kleopatra was a very smart woman. With all due respect to Elizabeth Taylor (who starred in the film), evidently the Kleopatra of ancient Egypt was not stunningly beautiful, but boy – she was smart! She was known to speak many languages and her capacity to ‘enchant’ men came through her mind.

She had a penchant for knowing what guests (male or female) liked or were interested in and aimed to make sure to surprise each person in little ways sure to delight.

Hers was a means of enchanting many…through connecting with them on a very individual and human level.

The asteroid Kleopatra is a main belt asteroid which as asteroids go, has a pretty ‘standard’ sort of orbital cycle length (4.68 years) and which runs pretty much to the center of the asteroid pack. We would thus have to think that Kleopatra is about understanding the main thrust of any situation, any question or any idea…drawing an even greater understanding through seeing the individual and how they do or don’t sync up with said ‘core’ concept.

Meanwhile, Pallas (aka Pallas Athena) is ‘dispassionate intellectual knowledge.’





While there are those who would probably like to say 
that the helmet worn by Athena is all about her being
 either very 'hard headed' or 'soft skulled,' the Greek
 representation is far more likely a reference to the type of 
logical, unemotional thought process which in being associated
with Athena comes from her having sprung - full grown - from
the brow of Jupiter/Zeus...In other words, Athena is that which is 'born' of
our 'mastery of understanding,' which makes our 'Athena capacity' 
all about our ability to resist emotional urgings in the finding
of our truth - and hence, what we utilize as a basis for
 proceeding through life and making something OF our lives.




All of this in a chart with six planets in water? No wonder so many people say ‘go figure’ when I go directly from being Athena-like to a delicate…almost fragile and childlike imp. On the other, this is probably a part of the core description which manifests as my being a writer…and hence, able to write about astrology with what we might call dispassionate feeling for the subject – and for its application in people’s lives.

Then we go back to that 29 Leo thing. 29 Leo is a degree which is highly concerned with relationship. Yet it also carries a message of duality. For many this will be expressed as the personal life (marriage and family) against the professional life, though there is an opinion voiced that this degree – in particular – specifies two marriages.

Yes, I’ve been married, though I’m not married currently.

And lest you think otherwise, I recognize that this Pallas-Kleopatra-Regulus complex can amount to showy brilliance. Or someone who is a show-off (whether they're brilliant or not). Remembering that the story of Kleopatra ends in her killing herself over love lost, there's a definite 'I'm to smart for my own good' sort of theme which may indicate something close to an 'unregulated' form of mental capacity.

Do I own any of that? Absolutely. I'm not sure if I am a classic sort of 'show off' but I've definitely gotten myself into pickles with others.

And even with myself. There is a point at which a busy brain becomes not a gift but a burden. I'm the first one to hold up my hand in that department. I understand how I became this way...I had a pretty variable childhood which kept me on my toes trying to avoid errant adults. (Hint: we call that "abuse.") I also had a parent that I wanted to please very much who made getting good grades the apparent price for love.

Until I got there. I was all set to graduate first in my class when that demand proved to be all talk and no love.

It was Kleopatra time.

I've also been too smart for various men who simply wanted a woman to be a 'yes' girl. I've actually been close to one man (as a friend) who wanted me to listen to him...but then didn't want me to remember what he said.

Like I said, Kleopatra time. There's a whole bunch of ways that life can be a pain in the asp.  

Then we get to Deucalion. The Greek Deucalion story is one you’d rather easily liken to that of the Biblical Noah. But there’s a difference. Being Greek myth and therefore about the us-versus-us trials we experience through the choices and challenges of life (rather than about mortal relationship with Divinity), the Deucalion story amounts to a question of how to find the moral path and whether we will find a moral and ethical path through life.

Then we bring in the KBO part. Since Deucalion is a Kuiper Belt Object and all KBOs orbit beyond the Neptunian gateway of ‘real/unreal’ (aka ‘known-versus-unknown’) this makes Deucalion a point which when active or activated indicates circumstances which evoke or provoke situations which test what we know…and our ability to learn.

Most of the time when we talk about KBOs we talk about either dwarf planets like Sedna and Eris or Plutinos like Pluto, Ixion or Orcus. (There are five or six Plutinos out there with no names on them, too I can’t wait for the international congress on such to name them!)

But Deucalion is a whole other kind of KBO. Known as a ‘Cubewano’ (a delightful sort of name which makes me think of an exotic sandwich) Deucalion may orbit beyond Neptune, but unlike Pluto, Ixion, Orcus and Huya, Deucalion is not subject to Neptune’s rather vast magnetic resonance control. Those Plutino orbits are governed by Neptune.







Therefore we know that the metaphysical effects of said objects (yes, including Pluto) is an affect which has a very distinct Neptune quality. Hence the transformative – delight or agonizing – effects we associate with Pluto, for instance.

But Deucalion? With Deucalion, none of that applies. So though we may be provoked or issues may be evoked by Deucalion transits or transits to Deucalion in our chart, they are not involve the sort of ‘emotional awareness / awareness of our emotionality’ that anything Neptunian or tied to Neptune does.

In other words, Deucalion is a thought provoking point, not an emotion provoking point.

So anyway…there my Deucalion is at 0 Virgo: a combination which tells us that despite all my watery emotionalism, I have a pragmatic and rational basis for deciding right from wrong.

Considering Deucalion is going to be in Virgo for a lot of people (it didn’t move into Libra until September 15, 1979) and how not all of them are pragmatic, rational, moral or ethical (alas), what makes the difference for me?

Three things: Pallas (which is an uber-logic point), Kleopatra being so closely conjunct Pallas…and Regulus, that famous not-so-fixed fixed star which promises success providing we do NOT allow ourselves the luxury of vengeance or revenge.

Okay…now we have to stage pretty well set for the GRAND REALIZATION I had while washing the dishes.




 A reverse-view shot of the Pantages Theater in Hollywood,
 California, one of the true architectural art-deco masterpieces
 around...not to mention a wonderful place to enjoy a theatrical
 performance. (photo credit: Christian Dionne, August 2009)




(True to six planets in water, I tend to realize most things when doing things like washing dishes, taking a shower or walking in the rain, of which there is far too little here in Southern California.)

And what was that realization? It was all about Regulus having moved from 29 Leo into 0 Virgo as of November 2011.

November 2011 was when havoc broke out in my life. (Again.) But it’s where it broke out and how it broke out and my instincts about it having broken out which got me where my Regulus-conjunct-Deucalion lives.

My problem erupted in the area of my health care – which is very obviously Virgo. And when those problems broke out, they were not only 'about' my health (which is bad enough) but right up the Virgo alley in that they had to do with the moral and ethical standards with which I was treated.

This proves that whoever we are, however strong or weak we are, how life will find a way to test our weak spots. If I'm going to be offended with people, the easiest way to get to me is to lie to me. Or to do something which is immoral, unethical or downright shoddy in nature.

Those are all Virgo qualities. And they get me.

One person in particular really offended me. And when it came right down to it, the humanity of the situation is what lastingly affects me. Yes, there was an obvious lack of quality, a compromise of ethics, standards and priorities.

But I'm a six planets in water person. So the fact that I didn't even get apologized to? That fries my catfish!

(I’m a Pisces, I can say that.)

I've heard all the excuses and "explanations" ...they don't hold a cup of dirty water with me.

But since all this fracas came to a head when a manuscript draft I had written about PTSD got in the mix...? That to me is the metaphysical clue.

Why? Because in that manuscript I had vented some rather snarly (read: snarky) opinions about the medical community. By implication, since that vitriol was - on my part - in part a reaction to ill-treatment, that constitutes revenge.

As it happens (and since it's of metaphysical interest here) the primary person I was offended with has  Deucalion in Virgo at a degree known for effects to the physical body - which fits the medical/health care surroundings. The degree is 20 Virgo, and anyone with  Deucalion at 20 Virgo is going to confront the need to 'find the moral path' between being overly defensive and dealing with things openly and honestly.

So the real question is...who went over to the dark side of their Deucalion first? Whoever did threw the cause-effect out of balance.

Deucalion is tough. It's far tougher than we would tend to think it would be, seeing as it's not connected to Neptune.

To that I'd say one thing: Eris isn't connected to Neptune and when dwarf planet Eris (i.e., Eris Discord) effects surface, we are by definition unsettled.

But yes, with Eris we have a chance to be renewed. And to expand into new 'territory' in our life.

Deucalion is trickier, as Deucalion is all about what happens when we hold ourselves to standards and when we fail standards. In Virgo (August 1953 - September 1979), Deucalion has to do with what we do and how we do it. Being that Virgo is an earth(y) sign, there's a tangible difference between the good we can do and the neglect of standards which in the end undermines us.

Getting back to the reason for this blog, which is about how my life changed when Regulus moved from 29 Leo into 0 Virgo, conjuncting my Deucalion.

The question of what to do about the medical hassle has gotten plenty of votes from friends and professionals alike. There have been many votes for "sue." But then...I do live in America. You ain’t nobody if you haven’t got a lawsuit in progress in the US!

But every time I get to that contemplation, I’ve rebelled against the quality of vengeance therein. And it wasn’t until I thought about Regulus conjuncting my Deucalion that I realized why that question would be/become so important to me.

And why - on the metaphysical plain - the situation had arisen when Regulus did conjunct my Deucalion.

But given how metaphysics works, I knew that realization should also give me a path forward. Yes, Regulus conjuncting Deucalion is bound to stir up such situations like my medical hassle. And because Regulus is going to be lingering at 0 Virgo for quite some time, I can expect periodic episodes which echo same.

(Oh joy, oh rapture...NOT!)

But how I respond? That's on me.That’s about MY Deucalion, MY Regulus and whether MY Kleopatra will cause me to reach for the basket with the asp...or whether I will just be...well, brilliant.

Let's remember...Kleopatra didn't get in trouble until she fell in love. (Or lust, depending on how you see the story.) That's a clarified metaphysical instruction to keep my logical Pallas wits on tap - even when my heartstrings feel the tug.





 Cleopatra by John William Waterhouse (1888)




2012 has given me a lot of new, a lot of perspective on the old and huge support from people I never dreamed existed before. But it’s also been one of the most painful years of my life. Yet I accept that growth isn’t always easy. Sometimes, in fact, growth is agonizing.

But when my realization dawned, when I recognized the symbolism of this metaphysical Regulus-Deucalion shift, something in me changed. 

And that’s what my life is about – and therefore, by implication, yours is too.

Hence, why I share. Since that day, the ‘tension of engagement’ between myself and those who I might have had trouble with has begun to drop away. That people close to me have begun looking at their own lives in a more constructive, self-determinative way suggests that our energies are so interlocked that any one of us can affect the next.

It’s not about ‘thinking good thoughts’ as some say. Denial is not a cure. Denial compounds tension just as vulnerability and willingness to try spreads the ability to build anew.

We each inspire others when we allow ourselves to be honest enough to inspire ourselves.

I have no idea if the medical community is even capable of issuing an apology. Maybe not. But if so, I would tend to think that part of the humanity has gone out of medicine.

And that's not a good thing.

Deucalion being transited by Regulus at 0 Virgo in my chart says I value manners and the manner in which things get done. Protocol and a willingness to do one’s best in meeting the proper standards is going to mean something to me probably until Regulus moves on to 1 Virgo in November 2083…by which time I expect to be watching from the other side. (Don’t put it past me!)

Understanding how these subtle shifts represent a ‘moving on’ in life is important. Maybe Regulus’ shift into Virgo didn’t mean as much to you. But maybe it did. Maybe your Sun is at 0 Virgo. Or your Moon. Or Psyche. Or Athena. Or Byblis. Or…

Or maybe you just have a free-floating feeling that more is being asked of you…in which case the question really becomes whether you will hold to your more selfish or better self. Regulus as a symbol of ‘success when revenge is avoided’ is a brilliant (star-like) crystallization of the idea that our harder, harsher, more selfish and bitterly vicious natures are never a plus. Whether you don’t want to decide or you don’t want to act, whether you don’t want to be bothered or you can’t be bothered to think, in the end it’s your relationship with your Self which is undermined or through awareness, enhanced.

I can’t fix that for you…but you can. And because you can, because you may need an example to use as a crowbar to help you pry your own situation apart, that's why I've told you this story.

And I wish you well with your efforts...as I wish you well - in every regard - with your life.



No comments:

Post a Comment